We doubt you'll be surprised to hear it, but here at The Pink House we're allergic to unimaginative, gendered kiddie wallpaper (pastel pink hearts and powder blue cartoon puppies - ugh!) in the same way we're allergic to kids' clothes covered in cutesy slogans: 'I'm mummy's little prince/princess'. Just plain wrong.
The thing is, a room may ostensibly be for your baby/toddler/child, but the reality is that YOU will be spending a LOT of time in there, possibly for hours on end (shout out to the breastfeeders). And yes, of course you want your little darling to be happy with their room, but, at the same time, you don't want to feel like ripping out your own eyes every time you walk through the nursery door. And that is why we have here an edited selected of five fabulous wallpapers that will look just dandy in a kids room, while still suiting YOUR taste.
1) Osborne & Little - Penguin Library
We actually had Vivienne Westwood's Squiggle wallpaper in the number one spot here, but we've just discovered - gasp! - that it's been discontinued. But actually, Penguin Library is a more-than-worthy replacement. Because not only does this cool wall covering look great (the Penguin book cover is nothing less than iconic work of art), it will ensure your child's head is filled with thoughts of books, which, of course, makes them cleverer. In fact, this wallpaper comes with a guarantee that if you put it up in your kid's room, they will read 67% more books* than if the walls were white.
*this is blatantly bollocks, but it's still a fab wallpaper
2) Hibou Home - Pirate Seas
OK, so this is an actual kids' wallpaper. But unlike so many of them, it's actually really cool. Hibou Home is a brand that understands that just because a design is 'for kids', doesn't mean it has to be either a) puerile, or b) badly made. So here you have a well-designed, high-quality children's wallpaper in a beautiful deep, chalky blue. Ideal for any child who loves adventures, which is pretty much all of them. Or hell, put it in your own bedroom - swashbuckling adventures aren't just for the under-12s, after all (think Johnny Depp). It's also in the 6yo Pink House Dweller's bedroom, as per this pic...
This beautiful wallpaper comes in three background colours (ivory, green, and aqua as seen here). With its soothing natural scenes, we think it's a great choice for a nursery; every time you have to clean up a poonami, you can simply glance at the happy little hummingbirds and know that, although Junior's outfit might be ruined, everything is going to be alright.
4) Cole & Son - Woods
We've said it before (see tip 4 of 6 Ways to Make Your Children Disappear) and we'll say it again - this is one versatile wallpaper. Its monochrome nature means that it goes with practically any decor or colour scheme, while still working in a bit of whimsy. As we know from our own childhood, woods are where all the cool magical stuff happens. So put this paper up in your mini-me's playroom or bedroom (a feature wall works well, or go the whole log - sorry - and slap it up everywhere) and who knows - they might even magically tidy their shit up!
5) Murals Wallpaper - Multicoloured Triangle
The brilliant thing about this wallpaper - apart from its obvious circus-style amazingness - is the fact that it's fully customisable. As in, you can choose the colours and the size of the triangles, and then it's specially made to fit your wall. And all this for an entirely reasonable £23.50 per square metre. You'll have to supply your own clowns, though - but if your family's anything like ours, that shouldn't be too hard...